I Remember

Twenty years ago today was a pivotal, life-altering day in my life.  I remember it like yesterday. 

I remember going to school and sitting in the gym...feeling like an elephant was on my chest.
I remember making it to first hour, and just needing to go home.
I remember my teacher, Miss Smith, mocked me and said to me, "Next time, come to school when you are healthy."
I remember my dad picking me up from school in the little black Nissan-full of irritation because he was in the middle of a bathroom remodel.  (He loathes house maintenance!)
I remember him sending me up to bed-you don't get to come home from school and play! 
I remember where my bed was-against the wall, in the corner. 
I remember hearing dad come up the stairs, thinking I was sleeping, and me making sure he heard me wheezing. 
I remember the doctor's office.  He checked my breathing, but no pneumonia, no pleurisy. 
I remember him walking out of the office to check a medical book.
I remember sitting on the table, looking at my dad, begging him to ask a question to the doctor.
I remember the little cup of water.
I remember the finger stick-I even remember the big meter they used.
I remember the doctor walking out again.
I remember my dad's tears...my heartbreak for his pain...and my confusion.
I remember going home to pack.
I remember the suitcase I used.
I remember my dad's phone call (from home...this was before cell phones!) to my mom, telling her we were going to Children's. 
I remember her response-thinking he was trying to cover for breaking one of the bathroom tiles she had bought!
I remember the plastic chair I sat in outside of the Admissions desk. 
I remember the bed, and the sudden amount of flurry.
I remember my first IV, the veins rolling, me trying to be still, the pain!
I remember Joan, my nurse.  "You can be anything you want to be, except a missionary...but why would you want to do that?!?" 
I remember the intern doctor I thought was awfully handsome.  (Give a girl a break...I was 13!)
I remember the visitors-I had a lot of visitors!
I remember the balloons-some even had my name on them.
I remember the teddy bear with the pacifier and the pens dad bought me.
I remember the praying bear Church bought, with satin angel wings.
I remember the hospital pull-out bed my mom slept in.
I remember the hourly arm or finger sticks they did.
I remember the team of doctors and nurses talking about how "lucky" I was-a few more hours, and I would have been in a coma, that would have caused my death.  
I remember waiting to be "cured," for when this crazy roller coaster could be over, and I could go back to drinking a Super-sized Mello Yello without trying to figure out how many carbs were in it. 

Like I said, a pivotal day in my life.  What I saw as punishment, God used as a refining fire to draw me to His desires for me.  To limit me, so I would have to listen to Him.  To help me to see how many abundant blessings He poured out on me.  To never take for granted life, and to appreciate the lives He graciously entrusted to me.  I learned that faith is not measured, the body will fail no matter how "healthy" we appear, and that we are only sustained each day by His loving, gracious, and sovereign Hand.  And I am grateful.